Zevie
by zevieshipper13
Summary: Justin Cole finally asks Stevie out! How will Zander react? How will the date go? Will anyone find out who the real Stevie is? You'll have to read to find out. Rated T, for mature-ish storylines. STORY BETTER THAN SUMMARY, I PROMISE! PLEASE READ AND REVIEW!
1. Chapter 1

**okay, this is my first ever fanfic! i hope you like it! i'm gonna try and update as soon as possible! btw, not any Zevie in this chapter, but it's coming. trust me. well i'll shut up now! enjoy!**

(Stevie POV)

"STEVIE! IS IT TRUE!" Kacey screamed while entering our band room.

"Is what true?" I ask, even though I'm pretty sure I know what she is going to say next.

"DID JUSTIN COLE ASK YOU OUT!"

I knew it.

"Yesssssss!" I say excitedly.

She grabs my wrists and starts jumping up and down and screaming. After about a minute of that I decide to join her, because, to be honest, I was just as excited as she was. Maybe even more, which is weird for me. I never normally get this excited, but come on, its JUSTIN FREAKING COLE. Who wouldn't freak out if he asked you out on a date? Our freak out session ended when I saw Kevin, Nelson, and Zander run in with worried expressions on their faces. They must've heard our screaming. They were holding their books like baseball bats.

"What's going on?" Kevin asks.

"Justin Cole asked Stevie out that's what's going on!" Kacey explained. We then resume our freak out session for a good five minutes. When we stopped, the boys were giving me really confused looks.

"What? It's my first date and I'm excited. Sue me." I said aggressively.

"You've never been on a date before?" Zander asked shocked.

"No I haven't, now can we please just drop the subject and start rehearsal?" I said annoyed.

They all backed away from me cautiously. _Whatever,_ I thought. I picked up my bass and Kevin counted us down.


	2. Chapter 2

After we finished rehearsal Kacey ran out all excited about some shoe sale. Kevin and Nelson left shortly after complaining about how their sisters keep stealing their game boys and making them die. That only left me and Zander. We both sat down with our writing journals and instruments, ready to start a new song.. We must've been thinking the same thing. Not surprising. It _is_ me and Zander we're talking about. After sitting in silence for a while, Zander finally breaks the ice.

"So… excited for your date?" He asks.

"No, not at all. That's why I was screaming and jumping up and down with Kacey for five minutes straight." I reply sarcastically.

"Well excuse me for trying to start a conversation." He says hurt.

"Sorry. I'm just a little nervous. I mean what if something goes wrong?"

"Nothing is going to go wrong Steves. I promise."

"Thanks Z."

"So when's the date?" He asked curiously.

"Tonight, 7 o'clock, Breadstix." I said.

"Ooh, Breadstix? Boy better have some cash with him!"

"He's Justin Cole. When does he not have cash?"

"Valid point. Anyways, what are you gonna wear?" He raises his eyebrows up and down.

"Gee, I don't know Kacey! What should I wear?" I smirk. I love sarcasm. It's my second language.

"Haha, you're so funny." He said, equally sarcastic. "Seriously though, what are you wearing? Breadstix is a nice place, combat boots aren't gonna cut it there! You gotta dress up! I'm talking dress, heels, makeup."

"Crap. I didn't even think of that. I guess I'm gonna have to borrow something from Kacey."

"You better catch her before she leaves to go shopping." He says.

"But we didn't write anything today."

"Don't worry about it, I'll start later." He reassures me.

"Okay, thanks Z. You're a great friend! Bye!" I said running out of the room.

"Yeah…friend." He mutters under his breath once he thinks I've left.

_What's that supposed to mean?_ I think. _Oh well, I don't have time to worry about this right now. I need to go find Kacey!_


	3. Chapter 3

I had to chase Kacey through the mall, but I found her! I got the CUTEST dress to wear tonight! Can you believe that? The words "cutest" and "dress" in the same sentence? I'm as shocked as you are. It's a dark teal, one shoulder dress with ruffles up the side and it cuts off mid-thigh. I also have on silver strappy heels. I'm surprised I haven't fallen on my face yet. I looked at the clock, 6:55. Shoot, I better get going! Luckily I live two minutes away from Breadstix. I quickly finish my makeup, grab my phone, and leave. I'm so excited I can hardly contain it!

I check my phone again, 7:04. _He must be running late, _I reassured myself. I looked up to see a perky blonde waitress maybe 22 years old staring at me. I flinched, and she looked at me apologetically.

"Sorry to scare you there dear! Can I get you something to drink!" she asked.

"Um yes, I'll have a Pepsi please."

"Coming right up! My name is Deborah by the way. You can flag me down if you need anything!"

"Alright, thank you." I smiled.

It was 7:11 and still no Justin. _What is going on?_ I was cut out of my thought when I heard that voice again. _Ugh, she's nice but sooooo annoying._

"Here's your beverage! Can I take your order?" Deborah asked.

"Um that's okay. My date should be here any minute now."

"Alrighty then! I'll come back in a few!"

It was 7:30 and still no sign of Justin! I had been calling, texting, and tweeting him for the past half hour and not one reply. _Where is he?_ I started to get worried. _Could he have gotten hurt on the way over? Could he have forgotten about our date? Could he have stood me up? No Stevie, don't think like that. Justin wouldn't do that to you. Would he? _Once again I was ripped out of my thoughts by that annoying voice.

"You sure you don't want to order? At least let me bring you some breadsticks!"

"No really, I'm okay. Thank you though."

"Alright…"

Okay, it's 8:00. Now I'm just plain mad. _Why would he do this to me?_ Never fails, I was ripped out of my thoughts for the third time by Deborah. _ My gosh, that women has terrible timing._

"Sweetheart, I'm gonna have to move you." She said.

"Huh?" I asked, furrowing my brows.

"We need your booth for couples." She explained.

"But I am on a date too!" I said frustrated.

"Really? Because it's been an hour since you got here, and you've been alone the whole time."

"Whatever, forget it. I'm leaving anyways." I got up, slammed my napkin on the table and stormed out, trying to hold my tears back. _I can't believe Justin stood me up. How am I supposed to face him at school tomorrow? How am I supposed to see him without wanting to rip his face off? How am I gonna face my friends without crying my eyes out? What am I gonna do? _Just then my phone started ringing. _If it's Justin, I'm going to scream._ I thought to myself. But it wasn't. It was Zander. Zander, the other person that I don't want to talk to. I know I can't talk to him without crying so I pressed decline and ran home, letting my tears fall freely.


	4. Chapter 4

**First off, thank you so much for your kind reviews! It means so much to me that people are interested in my story! I love all of my readers and reviewers. Second, I have decided to change the tone of the story a bit. I'm the kind of person that likes the intense stuff; therefore this story is going to end up that way. I have some great ideas in my brain and I can't wait for you all to read them! Well, I'll stop talking now! Here's chapter four! Enjoy! **

**P.S. I don't own HTR, Breadstix, or Game Boys. **

**P.P.S. Does anyone of you incredible people know what TV show I got Breadstix from? Special shoutout if you get it right!**

I have been sitting on my bed in the dark bawling my eyes out for almost an hour now. i still can't believe he did this to me. All of a sudden I hear my phone go off again. _Zander_. I pressed decline for the seventh time tonight. I know I should answer and reassure him that I'm okay, but I'm not okay. And I refuse to lie to my best friend like that. I cried for about 10 more minutes before I heard my door open.

"Go away Mom, I don't wanna talk about it!"

"It's me."

Oh great, the moment I have been dreading all night. I should've known this was gonna happen.

"Zander please leave. I'm not in the mood." I answer, my back still to him.

"Not until you tell me why you haven't been answering my calls."

I rolled over to face him. I saw his eyes go wide and his jaw slightly drop. I started to wonder why until I realized that I was still crying. He has never seen me cry. Hardly anyone has. He walks over and, without questions, gives me a hug. We stay like that for a little while until he finally pulls away.

"What's wrong Steves? Did the date not go well?" He replies, concerned.

"The date not going well would be an understatement."

"What do you mean?"

"For a date not to go well, two people would have to show up."

"I'm not following." He says, eyebrows furrowed.

"You have to have two people for a date." I said bluntly.

"He stood you up!" He asked shocked. I nodded, knowing that if I said another word it would turn into a full on sob. "Steves, I'm so sorry." He said kindly.

I lost it. Soon enough my tears were falling like waterfall. Zander just kind of sat there, not knowing what to do. I don't blame him though, if the roles were reversed, I would be doing the same thing.

"I just…. want to know…. what I did wrong." I said in between sobs.

"You did nothing wrong. Justin is just an idiot."

Ignoring what he just said, I went on, still sobbing. "Am I not pretty enough? Am I not cool enough? Am I just some loser that was insane for thinking she had a chance? I just want some answers!" I cried. I couldn't look at Zander's sad expression anymore, so I started picking off my purple nail polish. I hate this. I hate being so weak and insecure.

"Steves," he said tilting my chin up so that we were staring into each other's eyes and wiped my tears with his thumb. "You're perfect."

Then something happened. I leaned in and kissed him. I was shocked, but he kissed me back. When he lean away he had a scared look on his face and his skin went pale.

"I have to go." He said as he rushed out of my room.

_What just happened?_ I sat there shocked. _Did he not like the kiss? Was it a mistake? NO. Stop it. It couldn't have been a mistake. Did I just ruin the one good thing in my life? _I couldn't take it anymore. I got up and waked into my bathroom, tears still falling, harder than ever now, and grabbed my razor. I took it to my wrist and slid it across in one swift motion. It burned. But it felt so good. It was just what I needed. I cleaned up the blood and cried myself to sleep. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Who am I kidding, I know it won't be. Looks like me and my razor will be having a meeting every night from now on.

**I told you it would get intense! Please, again, if you don't like reading this kind of stuff, don't read it. If you do, READ READ READ! And don't forget to review! 3**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay so, in a review I got it said that Stevie wouldn't do that just because Justin stood her up. I just wanted to clarify, she didn't do it just because of Justin, she also did it because she thought she screwed up her relationship with Zander & she needed to let out some steam. There are also some more things that have yet to be found out that contribute to her cutting herself. I know it's kind of confusing right now, but just keep reading this story. I promise you'll understand eventually. Here's chapter 5! Hope you like it! It's a longer one too!**

**P.S. Really? No one knows what Breadstix is from? hahah**

I woke up the next morning, my eyes till red, and my face still puffy. _Get yourself together Stevie! You're the tough one!_ I jumped in the shower, got dressed and was on my way to school. _You can do this Stevie. You can face Justin. You can face your friends. You can face the Perfs. YOU CAN DO THIS. _I reassured myself. I reached the school in less than five minutes. _Well, here goes nothing._ I walked in and to my locker to find Kacey standing there, arms crossed, foot tapping. _Oh gosh, here we go._

"STEVANA RAINA BASKARA! WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME AFTER YOUR DATE LAST NIGHT!" She screamed.

"Sorry Kace, I forgot." I shrugged and opened my locker. _Please drop the subject Kacey, please drop the subject._

"So how did it go!"

_Crap._

"Umm…. pretty well." I said. Maybe she'll believe me and leave me alone.

"Reaaally? I don't buy it. Something went wrong, I can tell."

"He didn't show." I mumbled under my breath.

"What was that?" She said pointing to her ear.

"He didn't show up." I said, making sure she could hear me this time.

"WHAT! That jerk! Are you okay?"

"Yeah I guess. Can we just drop it?"

"Of course. So how's the song you and Zander are writing!" She asked enthusiastically.

I flinched when she said his name. I didn't even think about how I was gonna face Zander.

"Umm hello? Earth to Stevie!" She said waving her hand in front of my face.

"I gotta go Kace, talk to you later." I said and ran down the hallway. I need to escape. I ran to the band room, but just my luck, he was already there.

"Hey Steves." He said awkwardly.

"Hey Zander." I said, equally awkwardly.

"Can we talk? About what happened last night?" He asked cautiously while running his fingers through his hair.

"Sure, what's up?" I said, mentally freaking out. _Oh gosh, here it comes. The moment when our friendship ends. _

"Why did you kiss me?" He finally spits out.

"I don't know, I guess I just thought it felt right." I shrugged.

"Oh… Do you like me? Like, Like-like me? Like, more than a friend like?"

"I don't know, maybe. Do you like me? Like, like-like me? Like, more than a friend like?" I wondered.

There was a long awkward silence.

"You know what. Just forget it. It's okay. I'll get over it." I said about to run out of the room. But then he grabbed my arm and turned me around.

"I like you too Steves."

"Really?"

"Really."

"What does this mean for us? I asked nervously.

"I guess this means that you and I are dating. Soo… Stevie, will you go on a date with me?"

"Only if you promise to show up." I teased halfheartedly.

"Swear." He answered, seriously. Then he leaned in an pecked me on the lips. My heart raced. _Maybe I won't be visiting the razor anymore._ I thought.

We walked out to the lunchroom to find Kevin, Nelson, and Kacey already sitting down. They motioned us over, but something stopped me. I saw Justin coming my way. Zander gave me a looks that read "You want me to scare him away?" I shook my head no and he sat down, giving me some privacy.

"Hey Stevie." Justin said, as if nothing happened.

I shook my head in disbelief. "Hey Stevie? That's all I get after what you did to me?"

"Look, I'm didn't come over here to get yelled at. I came over because I wanted to talk to you."

"Well you better walk away, because all I am going to do is yell at you." I said icily.

"Whatever Loserberry. I didn't like you anyway. I only asked you out because I felt bad for you." He turned around and walked away.

I stood there, stunned, trying to hold my tears in. Zander must've noticed because before I knew it I was getting pulled down the hallway and into the band room. Once the door closed, I lost it again. This time Zander pulled me in for a hug and we rocked back and forth until I calmed down. When we pulled apart I noticed that the rest of the band was standing right behind me, patting my back.

"I'm so sorry Stevie." Nelson said. Kevin nodded his head in agreement.

"Thanks guys." I said, giving them all hugs.

We started rehearsal by having a group hug. That's how we ended it too. It was sweet. It made me feel like we were a family. I decided now was the right time to break the news.

"Guys, Zander and I have something to tell you." They gave us confused looks. "We are dating." I turned my head to smile at Zander. He kissed me on the cheek.

"AWWWWW!" The three of them said.

We hugged once again before they all left, leaving me by myself in the band room. I had to pee so I walked out and headed towards the Perf bathroom. What I saw when I got there was horror. Zander and Molly were making out. MAKING OUT. Just as Molly stated to unbutton Zander's shirt, he opened his eyes and saw me. His smiled faded immediately.

"Oh crap." He said. Molly turned around confused but smirked the second she saw me. _That witch._

I ran out of the school before my tears turned into a waterfall again. "STEVIE!" I heard Zander yell. But it was too late; I was out the door and halfway home before I really realized what I had just witnessed. _Zander and Molly. OH MY GOSH. I can't believe this. I opened myself up to him! I trusted him and all he did was stab me in the back! I hate him. I hate my best friend. No, make that ex-best friend._

Once I reached my house I sprinted upstairs, slammed the door, and locked it. I don't want to see or speak to anyone right now. *beep beep* went my phone. I chucked it against the wall, not even caring if it shattered. _Let it shatter, just like my heart. _I thought. I got in bed, not even caring that it was only 4;30, and cried myself to sleep for the second time this week.


	6. AUTHORS NOTE

_**This chapter is only going to be an Authors Note. **_

**Okay, so I got my first mean-ish review and I have to say, it really hurt my feelings. You were accusing me of things that aren't true. I do not support cutting or anything having to do with suicide. I just wrote about it because I thought it would be a nice challenge. If you don't like my story, don't read it. I have said that in the past two chapters.**

**This story isn't exactly like the show. The only thing that is the same about it is the characters names and personalities. Not even their families are the same. For example, Kevin and Nelson don't have siblings on the show (as far as we know) but they both have sisters in my story. **

**There isn't a limit on things being different. It's my story and I can do whatever I want. We all have opinions. You've expressed yours, now I'm expressing mine. **

**Who said Stevie was suicidal? I didn't. **

**I like the way I write my story. Short and right to the point. I try to do the chapters all at one place so they're not confusing. Every chapter had been like that. **

**To be honest, I would rather you stopped reading now than keep getting these rude reviews. I'm writing what I feel like writing; I'm aloud to do that. **

**Now on a more positive note, two people got my Breadstix question right! It was from Glee! Shoutouts to xxMarkSallingsBabyGirlxx and LuluAFan! Congrats! Thank you for your sweet reviews! (Well, most of you) I'm so glad the ending shocked you guys!**

**Also, I know the Stevie cutting thing is a bit mature and saddening for some people, but I promise that part of the story will be a happy ending! I don't want to spoil it, but I think you guys will love it! **

**Keep reading and reviewing! But, if I get a bunch more mean reviews, I'm going to discontinue the story. I'm sorry, but my self-esteem just can't take that. **

**I will try to update as soon as possible! Love you all! The real chapter 6 will be up soon!**

**P.S. follow me on twittahhhhh! zevie_shipper 3 **


	7. Chapter 7

I wake up to my phone going off. I walked over to where I threw it and picked it up, a little surprised. _Holy crap, how did it survive? I threw that thing hard!_I unlocked it. Its only 8:00 and I already have 15 missed texts and 4 missed calls all from the same person. Zander. I walked up to my desk, feeling extremely inspired to finish a song I had been working on for months now. _Screw school, _I thought, _I'm already late anyways a couple more hours won't make a difference.._

Three hours later I finally finished my song. _I'm so lucky I just live with my mom. She never gets mad and yells at me. She knows I can't handle it after last time._ As I sprinted out the door I got three more texts from Zander and a call from Kacey. I answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey, where are you! We're all worried." She asked.

"Oh I just overslept. I'm on my way right now." It was partially true. They don't know I write songs by myself without Zander's help, and I liked it that way. I like my privacy.

"Okay! See you soon!" Then she hung up.

I arrived at school about two minutes later. I glanced at my phone: 11:45. _Great, just in time for lunch._ As I walked to my usual table I remembered something. Zander sits at my table. _Oh well, I am not moving. I'll just ignore him if he says anything._ Sure enough, the second I sit down Zander is right behind me.

"Steves, can we talk?" He asked. I acted like I didn't hear him. "Stevie, please?" He tried again. I almost felt bad for him. He sounded so hurt and confused. _He deserves it._ I thought. "Stevie I'm begging you. Please?" He said sounding like he was on the verge of tears. I was about to give in, but then Kacey, Kevin, and Nelson sat down. So I changed the subject.

"Hey guys, what did I miss this morning?" The three of them all talked at once, explaining homework to me, telling me funny stories, yadda, yadda, yadda. I saw, out of the corner of my eye, Zander drop his head and walk away. Okay, now I really did feel bad. Even if he did kiss Molly he at least deserved a chance to explain himself, right? I excused myself and went looking for him.

When I found him he was sitting on the couch in the band room with a death grip on one of our pillows.

"Hey." I said shyly. He turned his head and I saw a glimmer of hope in his eyes.

"Hey." He said back, perking up a little. I decided to cut to the chase.

"You've got five minutes to explain yourself. Go." I said bluntly.

"Stevie I am so sorry. I don't know what came over me. One second I was leaving band rehearsal and the next Molly was on top of me. I tried to stop her, I really did. But something inside of me wouldn't let me. I don't know what it was. But the second I saw you I knew I had made a big mistake. I ruined everything. I feel terrible. I regret it so much. I don't even like Molly. I like you. No, I don't just like you Stevie. I love you. And I'm so sorry for acting like such a jerk. Will you ever forgive me?"

I don't know how to respond. _He loves me._ _He really loves me. I can tell. _"Zander…. I forgive you. But just because I forgive you doesn't mean I trust you again. You stabbed me in the back. You toyed with my emotions. It's going to take a lot more than an apology to win my trust back."

"What do I have to do? You name it, I'll do it. I'll do anything Stevie, anything. I just want things back to the way they were."

"I don't know yet. But I want that too. Let's just try being friends again, okay?"

"Sounds like a plan." He said with a smile on his face. I missed that goofy grin. I missed my best friend.

"So how's the songwriting coming?" I asked.

"It's coming. I'd make more progress if you'd help me."

"Sure, today after school?"

"It's a date." He smiled and walked away.

_Yeah, it's a date. And a test._ I smiled mischievously. I've got something up my sleeve…..

**Hope you liked it! If you're confused about what Stevie said about her mom knowing she can't handle her yelling at her, just wait. You'll get it soon enough. I'll try to continue to update as soon as possible! R&R!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay real quick, hoaluvpatrome567 my authors note was TOTALLY not about your review! You said similar things, but they weren't said rudely. I appreciate that. And I am soooooooo sorry you thought it was about you! It definitely wasn't! Also, special shoutouts to .34 and SMonkey6, thank you for reassuring me that I at least have two readers dying to know what happens next! It means a lot! **

**Sorry it took me sooooo long to update! I'm gonna be totally honest here: I had NO CLUE what Stevie's plan was going to be! Hahahahahahahahaha! But it's all good because I know now! And, if you don't like the cutting and such don't worry, this chapter is going to be the last of it! Yay! Hopefully no more mean reviews after that! WARNING: this is going to be kind of an angsty chapter, but the story will probably get a little more "fluffy" in the next few chapters! I hope you like it!**

**Okay I'm done. READ AND REVIEW! Reminder, I don't own HTR (man I wish I did.) Enjoy! Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo! **

It's 2:45, which means it's go time. I'm in my hiding spot, behind the vending machine. _I love being small_. I thought to myself. I heard the familiar clack of what I like to call "Man Heels" walking down the hallway. "Grace, it's time." I whispered into the walkie talkie.

"Kaykay!" She practically shouted. I rolled my eyes and continued to look Zander's direction. As he was walking into the band room Grace ran up to him, blocking the door.

"Hey there hottie." She said seductively.

"Hi Grace. Hey, could you move over a little? I'm trying to get into the band room."

She put her index finger up to his lips. "Shhh, time for talking is over." She started to lean in.

_This is it, the moment of truth._

"I can't do this Grace. I'm trying to win Stevie's trust back so that maybe we can go back to the way things were but she is going to hate me if she sees me doing this with you." He lightly pushed her hands off of him shoulders and backed away. "I'm sorry; I just don't like you like that." He turned around and started too walked away. I removed myself from my hiding spot, clapping slowly. He turned around, extremely confused.

"Congrats Z. You passed my test." I smirked.

He gave me an even more confused look. "Wait…. Were you hiding there the whole time?"

"Yup. Oh, thanks Grace. You can go now."

"No problem! Glad I could help! Byeeeee!" She said and skipped down the hallway and out the door.

"Come on, let's get writing." I said, pulling him into the band room. He still looked a bit confused. I laughed a little bit, earning myself a glare from him.

"That wasn't cool y'know. But I guess I deserved it."

"Yes you did. Now come on! Grab your guitar and let's get started!" I said.

"Okay okay! Gosh, you don't have to be so bossy." He muttered under his breath. I heard it anyways.

"Excuse me?" I said, arms crossed, glaring hardcore.

"Nothing, I said nothing!" He said scared. "Let's get started!"

Two hours later we had finished the new song. I was starving. I could tell when I heard my stomach start impersonating Chewbacca. Zander laughed, hearing it too.

"Well obviously you're hungry. Come on, let's go eat." He said dragging me out of the band room. Not literally, but you know what I mean. We walked to the nearest restaurant and ate. We joked, we laughed. We acted like nothing ever happened. I was feeling really happy. He walked me home, hugged me and left. I went upstairs and fell asleep, before anything could ruin my mood. For the first time in two days, I fell asleep with a smile on my face.

It was 3 o'clock in the morning. I'm sitting on my bathroom floor, watching the crimson liquid drip down my wrist. _Why am I doing this to myself? I had a great day. What is wrong with me? _But I couldn't stop. I just couldn't no matter how much I wanted to, the memory just kept coming back to me.

*_FLASHBACK*_

"_I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU! I CAN'T BELIEVE I HELPED MAKE SUCH AN EVIL PERSON LIKE YOU. I HATE YOU STEVANA. I HATE YOU. I DON'T CARE IF I AM YOUR FATHER. I HATE YOU. NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN. NOT ON YOUR BIRTHDAY, YOURE WEDDING DAY, EVER.I DON'T EVER WANT TO SEE YOUR DISGUSTING FACE AGAIN." The man she knew as her father screamed at her. _

"_What did I do wrong Dad? What did I do to make you hate me? Whatever it was, I'm so sorry Daddy. I'm so sorry." Stevie said sobbing. _

"_IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT NOW. You know what you did. Gosh, I can't even look at you, you monster. You disgust me. I'm leaving." He slammed the door, leaving Stevie and her mother in the house bewildered by what just happened. _

_*__END OF FLASHBACK*_

Stevie sobbed once again, remembering that terrible day. The day her father left them. The day her father said he hated her. The day she started cutting. The day everything started to fall apart. That was five months ago. Also known as the worst day of her life. Her friends knew nothing about it, other than the fact that her dad left. They had no clue why, but they didn't bother to ask. They knew better. Stevie was so thankful to have friends like them. They were the most amazing, sweet, caring people she knew. She loved each and every one of them. She knew that they would hate her if they found out what she does to herself. Her mother would too. She never told anyone and she never planned on it.

**Hope you like this one! I know the ending is a bit mature but I promise, the next chapter will be happy! R&R! And don't forget to follow me on twitter! zevie_shipper! Love you all! Byeee!**


	9. Chapter 9

"Hey Steves, what's up?" Zander asked concerned as I got into his car. I was still a bit down after what happened earlier. I guess he could tell.

"Nothing much. Thanks for taking me to school. I didn't feel like walking again." I said changing the subject.

"My pleasure." He said and drove away from my house. "So Steves, what's going on?" He tried again.

"Nothing." I said bluntly.

We arrived a few minutes later. I started to get out of the car but Zander stopped me.

"Steves, seriously what's wrong with you? You've been silent this entire car ride. That never happens."

"Nothing, I'm just tired." I lied.

"Stevie, come on. You can trust me. I proved that to you yesterday." He said.

"We are gonna be late." I sprinted out of the car and into the band room. He was right on my heels though. _Crap, I forgot he ran track._

"Stevie." He grabbed my arm. I shook it away. But then, it happened. My sleeve fell down. _No. oh no. please no. _I thought. "Stevie…..what is this?" he asked nervously. I shook my arm away and spinted to the girls bathroom. _This can't be happening. _I heard those darn Man Heels again."Stevie? I know you're in here. Please come out and talk to me. You know I can't come in." I didn't budge. "Please?" After about 2 minutes of silence I came out.

"What?" I said quietly.

"Give me your hand." He said. I shook my head no. "Please Steves." I rolled my eyes and gave him my hand. He started to move my sleeve. I slammed my hand on top of my wrist.

"Zander, no."

"Stevie, pull up your sleeve." He demanded.

"No."

"Pull up your sleeve!" he said aggressively. It scared me, I jumped.

"NO."

"I'm serious. Pull up your sleeve or I'm never talking to you again." He insisted. I could tell he was bluffing but I didn't want to risk it. I hesitated, but eventually moved my hand so he could pull it down himself. Once he did, the look on his face was terrible. He lost all color in his face, eyes widened, jaw dropped. I felt sick to my stomach. "Stevie." He looked up at me. I could tell he was on the verge of tears. I opened my mouth to say something, but only tears came out. "Shhhh, don't cry Steves." He took me into the band room and sat me down on the couch. I wiped my tears. "Stevie, look at me." He pulled my chin up to make me look him in the eyes. "Explain to me. Please, tell me why you do this." He pleaded.

I took a deep breath. _Zander is my best friend. I can trust him. I can tell him. He won't judge me. _"Okay well you know how my dad left right?"

"Yeah, why was that again?" he asked.

"Well…. I don't know."

"You lost me." He said confused.

"My dad…..." I took a deep breath. "He never told me why he left. He just screamed."

"What do you mean he screamed?"

"I mean he… he yelled at me. He said terrible things to me."

"Like what?"

'He said I disgusted him. He said I was evil, and to never speak to him again. He said…." _Breathe Stevie. _"…. He said I was a monster." I sobbed. "And then he just walked out."

"Is that when you, you know, started, you know?" He said, obviously uncomfortable.

"yes. I did it every single night for 3 months. Then I stopped."

"But some of them look, I don't know, new."

"Some of them are."

"What? From when?"

"When I kissed you, after Justin stood me up, and you ran out. I was so upset. I thought I ruined our friendship. So I went into my bathroom and, well you know. I also did it last night." He looked at me confused. "I was having flashbacks of what my dad said to me. That's why I've been so upset."

He looked completely stunned. i felt terrible. I had to escape. I started to run out of the room but I felt him grab my arm and turn me around. He pulled my sleeve up and kissed my wrist. "Steves, promise me you will never do this again? I don't know what I would do without you. Please Stevie, promise me."

"I promise." I said quietly, but loud enough that he could hear me. He pulled me into the tightest hug I have ever received.

"I love you Stevie." He whispered in my ear. Then he pulled me into a kiss. I swear, I have never felt so loved in my entire life.

"I love you too Zander."

**Hope you liked this chapter! It's one of my favs!**


	10. Chapter 10

**IM IN DOUBLE DIDGET CHAPTERS! AHHH! Enjoy!**

_I can't believe that just happened. I just told my best friend that I loved him. I and I'm glad I did._ We were still sitting on the band room couch cuddling. It was silent, but it wasn't an awkward silence. I was waiting for him to say something, because I sure wasn't going to be the one to start a conversation.

"Stevie?" he said.

"Yeah?"

"I have a question. But you don't have to answer if you don't want to."

"Ask away." I sat up and faced him.

"What did you do to your Dad to make him leave?" He wondered.

I took a deep breath. "See, that's the thing. I don't know. I just came home from school one day to him screaming at my mom. When I walked into the room he switched his focus to me."

"Did you try to find out?"

"Yes. I asked him that day over and over again. But he didn't answer me."

"Have you tried lately?"

"I haven't talked to him since that day, and I don't plan on it." I said bluntly.

"Oh….I have another question. Not about that though."

"What is this, 20 questions!?" I said sarcastically.

"Shut up. I'm curious." He said, fake pouting.

"Hahaha, okay. What was your other question?"

"Are we dating? Because I know you said that you wanted to just be friends but then I kissed you and now we are cuddling and so-"I cut him off by putting his lips to mine. When we pulled apart I smirked.

"Does that answer your question?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yes. Very well actually." He laughed.

"Z, we've been sitting in here all day." I said after looking at my phone and realizing it was 12:06.

"Well at least its lunchtime! Come on, let's go grab some food."

"Okay."

"Hey Steves, one last question."

I rolled my eyes. "What is it?" I asked

"Does anyone else know? You know about your dad and the cutting?" He whispered the last part.

"Well obviously my mom knows about my dad, but other than that, no. only you."

"Do you plan on telling anyone else?"

"I thought that was your last question?" I smirked. He glared at me. "No, I don't. And neither do you. Right?" I stared at him.

"Right. I won't tell a soul."

"Thanks Z."

"On one condition." He added.

"What?" I asked nervously.

"You never, ever do it again." He said seriously.

"I won't."

"Good. Now come on, I'm starving." He smiled and pulled me into the cafeteria, hand in hand. I think I'm gonna like this whole dating my best friend thing. I think I'm going to like it a lot.

**Sorry, I know its short but I had a lot to do today! Just FYI, no! this story will not be ending anytime soon! R&R! xoxoxoxoxoxox bye!**


	11. Chapter 11

**So sorry for the lack of updates! I started school and so I've been crazy busy! Also, I've had a wicked case of writers block! Therefore, this chappie may not be my best. Sowwwwwy! Please don't hate me! Loll**

We ate lunch and finished the school day. Sadly, all of my classes with Zander are before lunch, except for Mr. March's class, which we have last. He met me at my locker, gave me a kiss on the cheek then walked me into the classroom. He held the door and everything.

"Wow Z, you're such a gentleman." I teased.

"I try, I try." He joked back.

"Alright class, take your seats." Mr. March said after the bell rang. The class dragged on and on and on until finally the bell rang.

"Now all we have to do is make it through band practice and then we are free. " I said sighing.

"Hey, don't get too excited!" He teased. I elbowed him in the arm. He chuckled as we walked into the band room. Kacey and Kevin were already there.

"Where's Nelly?" I asked.

"I'm right here. Sorry, I had to pee." He said.

"Okay. Come on guys let's get started! We have a lot to do before our gig at the end of the month." Kacey said. We all groaned, but got up and got our instruments anyways.

We sang every single one of our songs. Every one. I thought my fingers were going to fall off. "Kacey please explain to me again why we had to do that!? My fingers are practically bleeding." I said annoyed.

"Because Stevie, if we want to get noticed and then signed and then become famous, we have to be PERFECT. We all want to be perfect right?"

"No Kacey, _you_ want to be perfect. We want to have fun. And _I_ would like to keep the skin on my fingers." I shot back. She rolled her eyes at me. _Wow, I really rubbed off on her. Oops._

"Anyways, Zander, Stevie, how's the new song coming?" She asked.

"Well, it's good considering we have absolutely nothing." Zander said.

"WHAT!? But you two just spent like a day writing songs!" She yelled, eyes bulged.

Zander and I exchange a look, and then die laughing. "Chill Kace," he said, "We were just kidding." She glared at us, and then grabbed my wrist, pulling me out of the room. Thankfully, she pulled over the sleeve. I could tell Zander was thinking the exact same thing.

"Stevie, you need to stay focused during rehearsal." She said.

"Um, I'm sorry. When was I not focused?" I asked, offended.

"Look I don't know what's going on between you and Zander, but something is different, and it's throwing off both of your guys' focuses."

"Can you keep a secret?" _That's a dumb question Stevie, of course she can't. She's the queen of gossip. Oh well, too late to turn back now._

"Ooh, yes. Spill." She said, poking my arm playfully.

"Well, you know how he and I broke up when I found out her cheated on me with Molly!?"

"HE WHAT?!" she screamed.

"You didn't know? I thought for sure I told you….."

"No, you didn't. Anyways, continue!"

"Well we broke up, and now we are back together. Kace, I think I'm in love. Me, Stevie Baskara, in love. Can you believe it!?"

"OMG STEVIE! I'm so happy for you!" she said and started squealing.

"Alright Kacey, shhhh, be quiet. No one else knows. You have to keep your big mouth shut this time!" I said sternly.

"Heyyyy!" This time she was offended.

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah I know, and trust me. I won't tell anyone! Your secret is safe with me." She mimed zipping her lips and throwing away the key. I chuckled. For the first time, I felt like she would actually keep her word and not use my life for gossip points. It was nice knowing I had someone I could share everything too. Especially after all these years of just being friends with boys. I needed a best friend that was a female.

"Good. Thank you." I smiled.

"Now come on, we need to have a band meeting!" She pulled me back into the band room while I silently whined to myself about how much I just wanted to go home and sleep. I was up half the night and after practicing all of our songs, I'm officially exhausted. Zander noticed and scooted towards me, letting me use his shoulder as a pillow. _Gosh, I love him. _I thought.

"I love you Steves." He whispered to me. It was almost like he read my mind. Not surprising really. It is Zander.

"I love you to Z." I whispered back. Then I closed my eyes and fell into a nice peaceful sleep while Kacey talked on and on about tour upcoming gig.

**Not my best, I know. Sorry again! Has anyone else noticed that almost every chapter has ended with Stevie falling asleep? I need some fresh ideas. Haha well, R&R. xoxoxo!**


	12. Chapter 12

**OMG GUYS! This is it! The FINAL chapter! You ready? Get excited. It's about to get cray. Y'all are gonna hate me at the end of this one. Also, if you have a slightly dirty mind (like me) you're going to be feeling really stupid after the first few paragraphs. Just a warning ;)**

**Disclaimer: I wish I owned HTR. Sadly, I don't. I also don't own the song in this chappie. I wish I owned that one too.**

It's been almost three months since the last time I cut myself. My life was going great. I had an amazing boyfriend and incredible band. We've been closer than ever lately. I can trust them with anything. They're my best friends. Things were finally working out for me. So I have decided, I'm ready to do this.

"Zander wait up!" I speed walked down the hall to catch up to him.

'Whats up baby?" He said. **(Sorry, I couldn't resist!)**

"I'm ready." I said

"Really? That's amazing Steves."

"I know. I've waited too long. This has been long overdue."

"Couldn't agree more. Come on, let's go do this!" He said and pulled me into the band room where Kacey, Kevin, and Nelson were waiting for us.

"Hey guys, ready to rehearse?" Kacey asked.

"Not yet." I looked at Zander, who gave a reassuring smile. I took a deep breath and went on. "I have something that I need to tell you all. And I know I should've done this a long time ago, but I was scared that you all would hate me and pity me, and I didn't want that. So I'm sorry for not telling you sooner." The three of them gave me confused looks. Without another word, I lifted up my sleeve, revealing almost 4 months worth of scars. They all had the same reaction as Zander: faces paled, jaws dropped, loss of words. I felt the same pang of guilt as I did when I told Zander.

"Stevie, is this….?" Nelson asked shakily.

"Yes, it is. I used to cut myself. Every single day." Zander rubbed my back supportivly.

"Wait, used to? So you don't anymore?" Kevin scratched his head.

"No, I stopped about three months ago." I said proudly. Kevin and Nelson nodded. Kacey was still frozen. "Kace, you okay?" I asked.

"Why Stevie? Why did you do it?" She finally said.

I explained the story of my father and Justin to them not leaving out any details. They listened to every word and didn't interrupt me once. Once I was done, I felt so relieved. No more secrets.

"Wait, Zander. Why aren't you surprised? Out of all of us, I would think this would shock you the most." Kacey asked while Kevin and Nelson nodded in agreement.

"It did when I found out." He said. They looked at him confused. "I knew." He explained. All of their faces immediately went from confused to furious.

'YOU KNEW AND YOU DIDN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!?" Nelson screamed. Kacey walked up and smacked him right in the face. I gasped. _Oh my gosh, this wasn't supposed to happen! _Kevin was about to punch him in the face, but I quickly stepped in.

"Guys, stop! He did nothing wrong!"

"YES HE DID. HE KNEW YOU CUT YOURSELF AND HE LET YOU DO IT!" Kevin screamed.

"No, guys that's not how it happened!" Zander tried.

"Shut up Zander. I can't believe you would let this happen. She is supposedly your best friend. How could you do nothing about this!?" Kacey asked, icily. Then they all went back to yelling abuse at Zander. Zander just stood there and took it. That's what bothered me the most. He didn't even attempt to defend himself. I had finally had enough. I walked up to Kevin's drums, picked up the sticks, and banged as hard as I possibly could until I got them to shut up.

"Zander did nothing wrong. He is actually the one that got me to stop. He made me promise him that I would never ever do it again. He helped me. Without him, who knows if I would even be standing here right now. So stop it." I said, calmly but sternly.

"Sorry bro. We shouldn't have jumped to conclusions." Kevin said.

"Yeah, it was wrong of us to blame you." Nelson added.

"Sorry Zander, I shouldn't have hit you. I think we were just all in such shock and we took it out on you. We are really sorry." Kacey finished.

"it's okay guys. I understand why you did what you all did. I forgive you." Zander said kindly. I walked up to him and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.

"I'm glad there aren't any more secrets between us. I can finally be the real me around you all and I'm so glad." I said. We all went in for a group hug. After that, I said I had to leave for work. Oddly, I was the only one that left. It was weird. Normally when one person leaves, the rest of the bad follows. Oh well.

THE NEXT DAY.

It was time for band rehearsal today. The four of them had been acting really suspicious since yesterday. I was kind of starting to worry._ Calm down Stevie, you're just paranoid. _I walked into the band room to find all of them in there, instruments in hand, ready to play.

"Sorry guys, I didn't know you were waiting on me." I said, walking over to my bass. Zander stopped me.

"No, you aren't playing in this one." He said, moving me over to the couch. I sat on the back of it.

"What are you talking about? I play in all of our songs." I was really confused now.

"Not this one," Zander said. I gave him a confused and suspicious look. _What is going on?_

"Stevie, we wrote something yesterday after you left. It meant a lot to us that you trusted us enough to open up about something so personal. So we thought we would try to somewhat return the favor. "Kacey explained. I was still confused.

"This song is for you Steves." Zander said. He walked back to his guitar and started playing.

_[Kacey]_

"_I can't pretend to know how you feel_

_But know that I'm here_

_Know that I'm real_

_[Zander]_

_Say what you want or don't talk at all_

_[Kacey] _

_Not gonna let you fall_

_[Both]_

_Reach for my hand cause its held out for you_

_My shoulders are small but you can cry on them too_

_Everything changes but one thing is true_

_Understand_

_We'll always be more than a band_

_[Kacey]_

_You used to brave the world all on your own_

_Now we won't let you g, go it alone_

_[Zander]_

_Be who you wanna be_

_Always stand tall_

_Not gonna let you fall_

_[Both]_

_Reach for my hand cause its held out for you_

_My shoulders are strong but you can cry on them too_

_Everything changes but one thing is true _

_Understand _

_We'll always be more than a band_

_[Kacey]_

_I never knew you could take me so far_

_I've always wanted the home that you are_

_The one_

_I need_

_[Kacey, Zander, Kevin, and Nelson]_

_Reach for my hand cause it's held out for you_

_My shoulders are strong but you can cry on the too_

_Everything changes but one thing is true _

_Understand_

_We'll always be more than a band_

_[Zander acapella]_

_Reach for my hand cause it's held out for you_

_My shoulders are strong but you can cry on them too_

_Everything changes but one thing is true_

_Understand_

_We'll always be more than a band_

They got up and gave me a giant hug. I was in tears. Of joy, of course. I have the best friends in the world. I seriously don't know what I would without them. Our hug was interrupted by a knock on our door.

"Stevie?" The strange voice said. I turned around and couldn't believe my eyes.

"Dad?"

**THE END! I'm so evillll. Thankk you all so much for reading! I have officially completed my first fan fiction! AHHHH this is cray cray! R&R! Love you all! Mwah!**


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